


threw our hearts into the sea

by kenobilovebot



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Dissociation, Gen, Obi-Wan Kenobi Gets a Hug, Obi-Wan Kenobi is a Mess, Post-Episode: s05e16 The Lawless
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:00:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25475029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kenobilovebot/pseuds/kenobilovebot
Summary: He thinks dimly, through the faint buzzing in his ears, that his feet must have carried him to the one place he might feel safe in the presence of another person.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 17
Kudos: 252





	threw our hearts into the sea

**Author's Note:**

> I think a lot about Obi-Wan coming to Anakin after Satine's death.

Obi-Wan doesn’t know what he’s doing here. 

Nothing has been enough to pierce through the fog that has so thoroughly enveloped him since --  _ since.  _ Not the journey back to Coruscant, not the Council’s displeasure. He does not remember coming here, nor making the decision to do so.

Here, to Anakin’s door. 

He thinks dimly, through the faint buzzing in his ears, that his feet must have carried him to the one place he  _ might  _ feel safe in the presence of another person.

Obi-Wan stands there. He is too muddled to do much else.

After some time, there is a hand at his shoulder. The Force signature that brushes up against his own with cautious concern is familiar, and in this moment it is the most comforting thing in the world. He reaches out along their bond, clings to it, and feels Anakin startle. 

There is another, smaller hand at his back. The two sets of hands turn him gently and oh -- Anakin is there, and so is Ahsoka. He stares at them. 

There is a vague thought that he must be in some sort of shock. 

“Master, we heard about the duchess,” Anakin is saying. It takes too long for the words to register, and Obi-Wan’s chest feels hollow.

_ Remember, my dear Obi-Wan -- _

The numbness is better than the hurt. 

“How long have you been standing here?” 

“I don’t know why I came here.” Is that his voice? It sounds strange to his own ears. Disjointed, far away. His tongue feels misshapen in his mouth. 

Anakin’s hand tightens on his arm. 

He should try to pull away. He doesn’t.

“I shouldn’t have come here,” his own voice concludes. “I’ll go -- I’m terribly sorry --”

The hands don’t release him. He is nudged into Anakin’s quarters. 

Ahsoka has _ his _ hand.

Obi-Wan just feels funny. 

Somehow, he is on the sofa. Ahsoka is rubbing a thumb over his palm gently, and there is a blanket over his legs. He hadn’t realized before that he was cold, but he does now. 

There is murmuring over him. He’s too drained to focus on the words, though he knows they’re about him. 

They worry too much. 

He doesn’t want them to leave. 

“Hey. No one is going anywhere. Master, look at me. We’ve got you.” 

Obi-Wan doesn’t remember speaking aloud. 

A careful arm slides around his shoulders, drawing him close against Anakin’s side. He should draw away. There’s a part of him that knows that, like it had before, and he still doesn’t. The arm is a comforting weight, and Ahsoka is still rubbing his hand, and he feels  _ held. _

He can breathe.

“Sorry,” he starts to murmur against black fabric, and a hand brushes through his hair. 

“I don’t want to hear any apologies, Master. Just lay here. Take a minute.” 

He can’t concentrate enough to protest. 

Obi-Wan falls asleep against a firm shoulder. 

* * *

When he wakes, comfortably warm and drowsy, much of the fog has dissipated. He’s no longer sitting up, instead curled on the sofa with his head in someone’s lap. Anakin’s, he realizes after a moment. Ahsoka is no longer beside him, but she is still here, her presence a faint hum in one of the bedrooms. 

The haze is gone, but he doesn’t quite feel himself. 

He doesn’t feel stable. He needs --

“Master?” A hand brushes against his hair again. He’s simply too tired to complain, or so he tells himself. “Are you alright?” Anakin’s voice is tentative. 

_ Remember, my dear Obi-Wan, I have loved you always.  _

There is a vise around his throat that prevents him from answering. 

He had failed her as thoroughly as he does everyone else. 

If he had not let his attachment become so obvious, if he had --

“Master?” 

He is unprepared for the sob that bursts forth, muffled against Anakin’s legs. His former apprentice freezes above him, hand hovering over his back as if afraid to touch, but there is nothing left in him to be embarrassed. Now that the floodgates are open, there is no stopping. 

He weeps. 

Obi-Wan startles badly when arms come around him, holding him tight. Not Anakin’s. Ahsoka’s. His grandpadawan has folded herself over his back protectively, and he’s still lying against Anakin’s lap, and he should be humiliated, but all he can do is cry like a youngling. He is a padawan all over again, having just lost his master to the sith apprentice on Naboo. He has lost Satine to the same man, all because he had been unable to do the job thoroughly. 

After a long moment, Anakin’s arms come around both of them. 

It’s not a comfortable position by any means, but it’s all that holds him together, all that prevents him shaking apart in the wake of this momentous loss. With their arms around him, his guilt can’t shatter him into a thousand pieces. 

Nothing is alright, but they won’t let him be alone.

**Author's Note:**

> I would love it if you guys would send me prompts. On [Tumblr,](http://kenobilovebot.tumblr.com) maybe?


End file.
